If you've been reading about my search for recipients you know that initially we picked the first lesbian couple to contact us. We had a lot of concerns about them but they met our basic criteria.
Our worries intensified after we spoke to them on the phone. The younger partner sounded sweet but the older one came across as a bit odd. From our first call she "coyly" tried to get us to reveal personal info like our address and last name. A knowable donor does not necessarily want to reveal that info, especially before a contract is signed.
Worse, she reneged on contract issues we had already agreed on. She was starting to seem like someone who could not be trusted to uphold her end of an open donation contract.
The more we dealt with these recipients, the more uncomfortable we felt. But over-riding our discomfort was the email they had sent describing their daughter's feelings about Judaism.
These women had issues but they were creating a Jewish home. With so many of my relatives murdered during World War, knowing children from these embryos would embrace the culture of their bloodline meant a lot to me. But these women were starting to sound pretty awful. What to do?
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile
Sunday, December 24, 2006
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Picking Recipients
We had some reservations about the first recipients to request our excess embryos but they met our basic criteria. Like us they were a long-term Jewish lesbian couple.
They refused to use our. Fertility clinic. Instead, they insisted we ship the embryo we proposed releasing to them. And they wanted it shipped to their doctor, the only doctor in their area who would even see lesbian couples. He is allowed to use the facilities at a fertility clinic so hypocritically "Christian" it won't treat single women, let alone gay couples.
These women did not seem to have great judgement and their hardball negotiation style was a drag but they had agreed to take only one embryo to start with so we decided to give them a shot. If they were meant to have a kid from our embryos it would work with one. If not, we could give them more embryos if our reservatoons prooved groundless.
We called to tell them the good news. They were happy to hear it since they had already told their 4-year old daughter we were going to help them give her a sibling.
What an awful thing to do to a child. And how manipulative to tell us. We looked at each other and my wife shook her head "no" but it was too late. We had already agreed and would not go back on our word.
"What are the next steps?" the recipients wanted to know.
"We have our lawyer draft a contract to release the embryo to you. She charges $1000."
"But you have 3 embryos."
"Yes, but as we wrote to you we will start by giving you one"
The recipients claimed not to have known this even though I had their email agreeing to it. But they again agreed to take only one when it became clear I would not back down. We ended the call with an agreement that I would have the lawyer contact them.
I could not believe what they did next...
Stay tuned for more when I return from vacation. Have a happy!
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile
They refused to use our. Fertility clinic. Instead, they insisted we ship the embryo we proposed releasing to them. And they wanted it shipped to their doctor, the only doctor in their area who would even see lesbian couples. He is allowed to use the facilities at a fertility clinic so hypocritically "Christian" it won't treat single women, let alone gay couples.
These women did not seem to have great judgement and their hardball negotiation style was a drag but they had agreed to take only one embryo to start with so we decided to give them a shot. If they were meant to have a kid from our embryos it would work with one. If not, we could give them more embryos if our reservatoons prooved groundless.
We called to tell them the good news. They were happy to hear it since they had already told their 4-year old daughter we were going to help them give her a sibling.
What an awful thing to do to a child. And how manipulative to tell us. We looked at each other and my wife shook her head "no" but it was too late. We had already agreed and would not go back on our word.
"What are the next steps?" the recipients wanted to know.
"We have our lawyer draft a contract to release the embryo to you. She charges $1000."
"But you have 3 embryos."
"Yes, but as we wrote to you we will start by giving you one"
The recipients claimed not to have known this even though I had their email agreeing to it. But they again agreed to take only one when it became clear I would not back down. We ended the call with an agreement that I would have the lawyer contact them.
I could not believe what they did next...
Stay tuned for more when I return from vacation. Have a happy!
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
